What 2016 Taught Me About Purpose and Intentionality
I’ve never really been into New Year’s Resolutions. The last few years I’ve just chosen words I really want to guide my thoughts and actions.
My words for 2015 were opportunity and adventure. On the opportunity front, I got my first consulting gig, started my doctoral program, and received an assistantship which provides funding and research experience. 2015 did not disappoint in the area of adventure. Domestically, I traveled for the first time to Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Denver. Internationally, I traveled to Japan and Korea and ended the year in Ghana.
One of my favorite activities from my few days in wine country: a self-guided tour of a vineyard in Sonoma that doubles as an art garden.
My view of the Akomsombo Dam from the Volta Hotel in Ghana. During lunch at the hotel, my friend’s dad told us about his childhood in the Volta region, the construction of the dam, and President Kwame Nkrumah’s legacy.
If 2015 was about change, 2016 was about focus. My words for 2016 were purpose and intentionality. Looking back, this manifested a few ways.
Writing with purpose. Last spring I took a course on Critical Foundations of Educational Inquiry. We learned different theories and methods to “critically” examine how diverse students are marginalized. For one project I read Patricia Hill Collins’ book Black Feminist Thought: Knowledge, Consciousness, and the Politics of Empowerment. The book is as much a narrative of Black women’s personal stories as it is research and epistemology. Her writings- and the critical approaches we learned throughout the semester- truly resonated with me. Since then, I’ve been trying to more intentionally join my purpose, my story, and my writing. Two internal conflicts have followed.
First, choosing to use storytelling as a scholar comes with a heavy tax. Throughout the course, my professor was very candid about the risks of being a critical researcher. There are many scholars who believe research must be done from a neutral, detached position that only produces verifiable data and facts. Critical research is often marginalized from mainstream conferences and publications. If classroom discussions are a proxy for a research career, adopting a critical stance can be very lonely work. Few will understand your views, even fewer will agree, and still fewer will join you.
Giving a guest lecture on Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs) to masters and doctoral students in the History of Higher Education class! Telling my family’s story helps underscore the legacy, impact, and imperative for HBCUs.
Second, choosing to share my personal story comes with vulnerability. I knew the transition back to being a fulltime student would be hard financially, and it was. I started this blog with the intention of coaching and consulting. I hoped it would help lead to a few jobs, and it has. I initially tried to limit topics to issues of education and nonprofit management in order to “build a platform”. Let this be a lesson in this time of side hustles, online businesses, and multiple streams of income: You can’t subsidize your purpose. By far, my most popular posts are those where I share personal stories and reflections. The papers where I’ve found ways to tie in my passion and work are the most enjoyable to write. I am still testing the waters, but writing with purpose has helped me move leaps and bounds from where I started.
Dating with purpose. When I hear this phrase I, like most people, think of it as dating with the intention of finding a spouse. 2016 has taught me that it means so much more: dating someone who compliments my purpose. Someone whose purpose and ideology align with my own. Someone who pushes me toward my purpose and checks me when I’m straying from it. When we first started dating, he sent me a text saying he’d call back in 30 minutes. I let him know I’d be in class by then and joked that I’d rather skip it and talk to him. He texted back: “Don’t ever miss out on class or anything else for me. Opportunities will pass, I’ll still be here”. This is a tiny example, but it meant a lot to me. It’s meant even more when he’s given feedback on papers or pushed my thinking in new ways. I am absolutely dating with the intention of finding my partner in life. But as India Arie beautifully sang, “However we turn out its alright, cuz he’s already changed my life.” That’s dating with purpose.
One of the most thoughtful gifts I’ve ever received. This is an old textbook of his, co-written by one of his former law school professors. He came across it a few months before my birthday at his parents’ house and gave it to me
Engaging intentionally. Being intentional has helped me learn the beauty of the word no. There are so many opportunities to get involved on campus and in the community, with friends and family. I’m not wired to think “What’s in it for me?” and I don’t ever aspire to be. I’m the friend who will gladly edit your resume last minute. I’ve helped with class reunions, baby showers, and weddings. I coordinate our cohort events and study groups. This year helped me understand the importance of reciprocity in relationships. Pausing to interrogate my own intentions before engaging has helped me focus my efforts. Interrogating others’ intentions has saved me a lot of time and energy. Being intentional is being honest about the impact and return of your involvement with a person, initiative, or organization. Sometimes the good thing to do, or the right thing to do, isn’t for you to do.
A few of my Higher Ed classmates and professors at the inaugural College of Education Doctoral Mixer. This was the first event I helped organize as the Doctoral Liaison for the Higher Ed Leadership Professionals (HELP) organization.
So what’s the word for 2017? I’ve been mulling it over for a few weeks and all I’m landing on is Productivity. This won’t be a race about me speeding through as much as possible. Instead it will be a hike about using my energy wisely, keeping pace, following the trail, and conquering the climb. Here we go.